I was just saying the truth
by Rosawithlie
Summary: It had been a couple of days since they went outside the walls. They had lost great team members and he missed every single one of them. As he slowly opened his eyes he saw the white ceiling staring back at him.


**Chapter 1.**

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_**Okay, so this is then first time I've ever done something like this, I have never written stories before, however I did play RPG in writing style (writing a story together) So please don't judge me if its bad! I promised one of my friends to write a story about her OTP, I don't know much about the story, so I'm sorry if I made some mistakes. **_

_**Also 1 last important thing: I'm 17 and English is not my first language, so if I made some mistakes in sentences, remember, I am doing my best. BTW criticism is always welcome, it might even help me improve my English. **_

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It had been a couple of days since they went outside the walls. They had lost great team members and he missed every single one of them. As he slowly opened his eyes he saw the white ceiling staring back at him. For a second he closed his eyes again, which he soon regretted. Again, he saw her face which slowly turned into the dead body which she was now. He had cared for all of them, but he had loved her. He never would have admitted it. He didn't wanted to love, not in a world like this, where he could lose the few people he loved, he wouldn't let himself go through something like that, not again, not after his parents.

A soft sigh escaped his mouth as he opened his eyes again. He slowly pushed himself up and realized he wasn't in his own room, he was in a much whiter room. He wanted to get out of bed but when he moved his left leg he felt an incredible amount of pain so immediately stopped moving, for a second it became black before his eyes but slowly his sight returned again as the pain faded away.

When he looked around in the room again he saw Erwin standing in the doorway. A weak smile was on his face, something which was rare. "You're awake again." Erwin said. A shiver ran down his spine as he looked at the man standing in the doorway. For just a moment he thought back about his days on the street, the day where he first had met Erwin. He could have brought him to justice but instead he had taken care of him, taken him under his wing and trained him. In the meantime they had become friends and due that he could see the sadness in his eyes. Not only he, himself had lost friends and team members, Erwin had as well. Erwin had also buried enough people, they all had. "My leg.." Was all Levi mumbled. Erwin took a few steps closer and nodded for a moment. His smile became brighter as he sat down on the chair in front of the bed, obviously someone had sat there before. He wondered for a moment if Erwin had been that person and had just returned from maybe a bathroom trip. "Give it time, your leg will be fine." Erwin said, still with a smile on his face. He let out another sigh. He didn't wanted to sit all day. He wanted to be able to move, not only because it was dangerous, because he couldn't do anything if they'd suddenly get attacked by a titan but also because he liked structure and discipline, meaning he didn't wanted to get off his training schedule. "Do you remember what happened?" Erwin asked him with a slight frown on his face. He was pulled out of his thoughts and nodded weakly. "I do." He said as he all saw it happening again like it was happening right now. Every time he saw her body again and every time he thought back her injuries only became worse and every time he had more questions. What if he would have been with them? Would he have been able to save them? To save her?

Erwin remained looking at him, a little confused. Levi was never this distracted, in fact he actually was never distracted at all. Erwin cleared his throat, which brought Levi back again.

Erwin his smile had disappeared in the mean time, he now had a rather sad look on his face. "We managed to catch another Titan while you were asleep." Erwin said, now more serious then before. Levi simply nodded. "So the trip wasn't completely useless and Hanji is extremely happy of course." Erwin continued, now with a weak smile on his face again. Levi was thinking about the female titan again, how it had taken Eren and how much rage and strength Mikasa had had. He had felt the same kind of anger when he had seen Petra her body. Somehow his thoughts kept wandering off to her, how kind and caring she had been, especially to Eren. He felt tears filling his eyes so he slowly laid down again. "I'm tired." Levi mumbled as he closed his eyes and turned away from Erwin. He couldn't and wouldn't cry, not because he had loved her, not because he had never told her and most certainly not because she had died. He wouldn't allow himself to cry.

Erwin nodded, a little disappointed but Levi was too busy with his thoughts to notice the disappointment. "Okay, I'll be back when there's more news." Erwin said as he stood up. Erwin looked at Levi once more, his smile slowly faded and then he started to walk to the door. "You know what to do when you need something, right?" Erwin asked. When he didn't heard an answer he let out a soft sigh and walked out of the room, closing the door behind him. Within seconds Levi had fallen asleep again.

_It was the day before they would go on the 57th expedition outside the walls. He had been nervous all day because he wanted to talk to Petra about something, well, not just something, he finally wanted to tell her how he felt. Even though he didn't wanted to love. He knew she also loved, so what was the worst that could happen? _

_A weak and nervous smile appeared on his face when he saw her. " Petra, could I talk to you for a moment?" He asked as he looked at Petra and then at the other team members. "In private." He said a little softer, almost like he was afraid someone else would here it. Petra nodded. "Of course." She said as a bright smile appeared on her face. _

_As they walked to the other room a million thoughts went around in his head, what if she would say no? What if she didn't liked him? What if he would regret it? He closed the door behind them as soon they were in the other room he let out a soft sigh. "I've wanted to tell you something for quite some time now." Levi mumbled, a little insecure, which was odd for him because he hardly ever was insecure and if he was he would never show it. Petra suddenly seemed a little different, like something had changed. "I euhm.." He started. He stopped when he noticed that her hair suddenly started to turn blond and her body changed into not someone's but something else's. It was like a smaller version of the female titan. "Petra?" Levi asked as he took a step back and reached for the door knob. A rather creepy grin appeared on the female titan her face and she pointed at a lifeless body in the corner, it was obviously a female and that person had broken her spine, but he didn't needed to know these things to know it was Petra who was laying there. _

_Before he had time to respond the female titan had already grabbed his arm and started to grow while holding him. She carried him like he we was weighing a feather. With every cell in his body he wanted to fight, but he couldn't. Not only because the female titan was way too strong for him, but also because Petra was laying dead on the ground, right in front of him. He closed his eyes and just waited for the female titan to kill him. However after a couple of minutes he opened them again, which he soon regretted because he saw himself going towards the mouth. However she did not put him in her mouth, the female titan lowered her hand again and balded her fist. For a moment he had hope, hope that he would survive, hope that he could get away, but that hope almost immediately went away again because he could feel his body slowly getting crushed by the hand of the female titan._

In a shock Levi woke up. He was sweating and breathing heavily. He sat up straight and looked around in the room, realizing that it all just had been a dream and that Petra already had died and he was still alive.

He listened to the footsteps in the hall, the water dripping and some muffling from some people. He couldn't hear what they were saying, all he knew was that it was serious. He remained sitting like that for a couple of minutes, until he had cached his breath again. He pushed the blanket off him and slowly putted his feet on the ground, ignoring the pain in his leg. He knew it would become even worse when he would stand up, but he didn't wanted to stay in this room anymore, he would fall asleep again and he wanted to know what was going on. A soft sigh escaped his mouth as he put one of his hands on the small table next to the bed. He pushed himself up, trying not to put too much weight on his left leg. As he was standing he slowly started putting weight on his left leg as well so he would be able to walk. Once he had managed to put a little bit of weight on his leg he started shuffling to the door, realizing that this was harder and more painful then he thought it would have been.

As he came into the hall he noticed a slight breeze. When he looked around he noticed a window, standing on an ajar. As he looked out of the window into the street he realized it was already later then he thought it had been. He had slept all day, at least thats what he thought, he didn't really had an perception in that room.

When he walked into the dining room he saw Hanji sitting, who was talking to Eren again. She again was telling story's about her experiments. It didn't really interested him but Eren obviously did. However when they saw him they stopped talking. "You're out of bed! How are you?" Hanji said, like usual with a lot of excitement in her voice. He was just about to answer when he heard a voice coming from behind him. "Leave him, he just woke up." He head Erwin say, who rested a hand on his shoulder and softly squeezed into it. He would normally hate that kind of contact but right now he didn't really matter, he was too busy trying to remain standing. He continued shuffling again until he had reached a chair and sat down on it. He let out a deep and relieved sigh. "Is there anything left to eat?" Levi asked looking up at Erwin. Erwin nodded and immediately walked away.

Only a minute later he returned with some food. Hanji had in the mean time already started telling him about her new titan, named Zep and Eren had left, he said he was going to look for Mikasa. When Erwin putted the plate of food down in front of him he immediately started eating, he had been hungry, which he hadn't even realized until now. Hanji was still telling him about Zep, even though it was obvious he wasn't really listening to her. He again was drowning in his thoughts. He felt anger, and this time towards Hanji. He wanted to yell at her but he remained calm, like he always was. "How can you be so happy right now? We've lost people, we have to bury people, people who didn't deserved it to die." He said with a cold and harsh voice. Hanji immediately stopped talked when she heard him say that. Her facial expression changed and became serious. "I grief in my own way." She mumbled softly, like she was afraid he would hear her. It only made Levi more mad, her answer. "So you're grieving by pretending to be happy by trying to pretend like it has never happened?" He asked. Hanji didn't answer him. "Answer me." Levi said. Hanji looked at Erwin for a moment, who looked away from her. "I euhm.." She started. "I've gotta go." She said, a little insulted and sad. Without him being able to reply to her she walked away, leaving Erwin and Levi alone. "Was that really necessary?" Erwin asked as he sat down next to Levi with a slight frown on his face. "What?" He asked as he finished eating. "Being so mean to her? Saying that to her?" Erwin asked. Levi let out a deep sigh and stood up. "I was just saying the truth." He said before shuffling out of the room and starting his way back to his room again.


End file.
